I love this time of year! I love the romance of Christmas and New Years. I know people think I am nuts when I say Christmas is a romantic time, but, from a Christian stand point, I think it is, a birth of a baby is very romantic, if you think of it, and the fact that the child grew up to be the man who would forgive our sins, now that can be romantic. Look how many jewelry commercials there are out there around this time of year, from necklaces, to earrings, to diamond engagement rings, this is not only the most wonderful time of the year, but it also the most romantic. My youngest sister married in December, as well, and it was very romantic, at twilight with candles, white and red colors.....
But, this time of year is also full of miracles. I love the idea of Santa Claus, so much so, I still believe in him. I know where the toys come from, I found out when I was a preteen and I had younger sisters, and we found out together, but, we agreed to continue with the belief, partly because of our parents, I think. My dad was big on Christmas and I have so many traditions because of him, and one of them being to continue to believe in Santa Claus, another miracle maker. To this day, as an adult, I have silently "prayed" or asked for things and somehow they seem to arrive on my doorstep a few days before or the day of Christmas. There is magic in the air during the holidays and I love it. We don't always have to know where or how, we just need to believe that its going to be there under our tree.
So, this holiday season I hope you are full of empowerment and if you don't feel that you are, then borrow it from believing in not only one of the most wonderful, but one of the most romantic times of the years. We all have the power to make changes happen and in receiving what it is that we want most. The power is in them shoes!
If you are interested in receiving individual relationship coaching, a new love for a new year! please contact me at mindfulcoachingandtherapy@gmail.com.
This blog is to help remind women, they can keep their power. Mary Speight, MA, LMFT is an Author, Reiki Practitioner, Relationship Coach and Licensed Therapist.
Holidays....
I am a HUGE fan of the holidays and my birthday kicks off the festivities, I love it! But, what I'm not a fan of is the stress that comes from what is supposed to be a great and wonderful time. I usually make my Christmas gifts. There was a time when I had no money, I mean none, I was close to being evicted, utilities were shut off and my best friend was making me care packages and I had to move out of the house I was renting quickly and my boyfriend at the time was no help. He actually got fired from his job and went into a severe depression and well, that was that.
So, I made my own ornaments and I loved them. They were little boots and stars, made out of harden clay, which I actually used flour, salt and water and cream of tartar. So, non-edible. But, since then, because money was so scarce, I silently vowed I would start making gifts and Christmas things. I'm not working my practice this month, so that means no additional money coming in, and I'm making edible gifts this year. But, it can be so stressful, can't it? I'm on my feet in the kitchen what seems like non-stop. I've got my head in a cook book or my eyes scanning the internet looking for delicious and quick little recipes and I feel like I'm missing out on the Christmas fun. Oh, I've got my music playing holiday music non-stop, but, I'm tired and I'm stressed.
I realized this morning, and the reason for this blog, I don't have to be stressed. There is power in realizing the joy and the happiness is still there and it hasn't left, and I don't have to be in the kitchen or on the internet, again today, not unless I am doing something totally unrelated to the holiday. What an empowering feeling. I am free to make choices and decisions and if things don't ALL get done, well, the truth is, maybe it wasn't all that necessary to beginning with.
Next week is Christmas and the following week is New Year's Eve. Stop and take a moment and reflect on this past year and try to be satisfied with where you are right now in your life, good, bad or indifferent. You can't change what has already happened, but, you can definitely change the present, so that your future will be just a little bit brighter. Enjoy this moment and recognize you do have the power and its in them shoes!
So, I made my own ornaments and I loved them. They were little boots and stars, made out of harden clay, which I actually used flour, salt and water and cream of tartar. So, non-edible. But, since then, because money was so scarce, I silently vowed I would start making gifts and Christmas things. I'm not working my practice this month, so that means no additional money coming in, and I'm making edible gifts this year. But, it can be so stressful, can't it? I'm on my feet in the kitchen what seems like non-stop. I've got my head in a cook book or my eyes scanning the internet looking for delicious and quick little recipes and I feel like I'm missing out on the Christmas fun. Oh, I've got my music playing holiday music non-stop, but, I'm tired and I'm stressed.
I realized this morning, and the reason for this blog, I don't have to be stressed. There is power in realizing the joy and the happiness is still there and it hasn't left, and I don't have to be in the kitchen or on the internet, again today, not unless I am doing something totally unrelated to the holiday. What an empowering feeling. I am free to make choices and decisions and if things don't ALL get done, well, the truth is, maybe it wasn't all that necessary to beginning with.
Next week is Christmas and the following week is New Year's Eve. Stop and take a moment and reflect on this past year and try to be satisfied with where you are right now in your life, good, bad or indifferent. You can't change what has already happened, but, you can definitely change the present, so that your future will be just a little bit brighter. Enjoy this moment and recognize you do have the power and its in them shoes!
Happy Holidays!!!
Power of discernment and to act
I've been thinking about the book I wrote, Kiss to Betrayal Coming Through Emotional and Mental Abuse (shameless plug, I know). I've been thinking about the relationship I endured for twelve years. It was a relationship of convenience, one in which I chose to stay and one that I thought was the best thing for me.
I am currently working on another book named Three A.M. Conversations with God and one of the things that brought my train of thought to the first book was discernment. Right now, I am going with the dictionary meaning of having keen insight or judgement. In that 12 year relationship, my insight or judgment was impaired due to a blind love I had for a man who only loved with conditions, limits, boundaries and rules. It wasn't until towards the end of the relationship did I pray for discernment, the true ability to trust my insight and judgement and for the strength to act upon what I knew to be the truth.
The power of discernment is very strong. We all have it and from time to time we use it, but, we have moments in our lives that there appears to be a lapse in judgment. I have no regrets over the relationship because I learned from it and I grew and matured because of it. And because I prayed for and received discernment, I can trust that it won't go away, I just need to trust myself and believe that I have the strength and fortitude to break out of the unpleasantness of a relationship, if it isn't right for me.
If you are struggling in a relationship and you aren't certain what you should do, believe you have the ability to discern what is good and what isn't working for you. Then trust that you are empowered to make a move, to act and get out of the relationship or at least make a choice to work at making it better. Remember, the power is in them shoes.
I am currently working on another book named Three A.M. Conversations with God and one of the things that brought my train of thought to the first book was discernment. Right now, I am going with the dictionary meaning of having keen insight or judgement. In that 12 year relationship, my insight or judgment was impaired due to a blind love I had for a man who only loved with conditions, limits, boundaries and rules. It wasn't until towards the end of the relationship did I pray for discernment, the true ability to trust my insight and judgement and for the strength to act upon what I knew to be the truth.
The power of discernment is very strong. We all have it and from time to time we use it, but, we have moments in our lives that there appears to be a lapse in judgment. I have no regrets over the relationship because I learned from it and I grew and matured because of it. And because I prayed for and received discernment, I can trust that it won't go away, I just need to trust myself and believe that I have the strength and fortitude to break out of the unpleasantness of a relationship, if it isn't right for me.
If you are struggling in a relationship and you aren't certain what you should do, believe you have the ability to discern what is good and what isn't working for you. Then trust that you are empowered to make a move, to act and get out of the relationship or at least make a choice to work at making it better. Remember, the power is in them shoes.
How powerful is waiting?
Its becoming that time of year again, when the weather starts to change, and if we're lucky, there is snow on the ground, or its raining and the wind is blowing, all depending on where in the world you are residing.
Its the 4th of December here in California and the weather is changing, and, I've decided to get a jump on my Christmas baking and gift giving, doing a lot of "dry" runs on baking, making sure everything taste right before I make that batch of cookies and deliver them. There seems to be a theme running this year with me. Last year, I made home made gifts and burned my forearm on the iron. This year happens to be no different, I am making home made gifts and I burned BOTH hands holding melted sugar....I know, I know...I wasn't thinking and now I have a huge blister in the middle of my palm, of my right hand. The swelling has gone down quite a bit, I am able to type, but, it has become a nuisance.
This all has brought me to stop and think about some things. For my private practice I am having to wait to have my license renewed before I can continue seeing clients, so, that means, I get a "vacation". I've also been sick and that has caused me to slow down a bit as well, and now I burned my hands, and for several days, I've had to stop and slow down and let someone else help me. Waiting. I'm not a fan of it, yet, I've been told I am one of the most patient people in the world, I'm really not a huge fan of waiting and relying on others, including my own body to heal. Silly, I know, but, I also think there are others of you out there who have the same frustration. I knew that the license renewal was/is going to take some time, and I am okay with the waiting, but, being in pain and not feeling well can bring on additional stress because there is so much that needs to be done, and I don't have time to sit and HEAL.
I challenge you to stop in the next few days, even the next few weeks, and allow yourself to heal. No matter what it is that you are going through, no matter whether it is trying to stop smoking or drinking, or you are frustrated because something didn't go right for you, or if you are working through a broken relationship and it doesn't matter who that happens to be with give yourself some time to heal. Allow God or the Universe to work their "magic" and heal your body and soul. But, you've got to sit and be still and wait, even if that means allowing someone to take care of you or handle whatever it is that needs to be done. The power is in waiting and you are empowered to do it. Then once you are healthy and happy, again, you will have the strength to carry on and complete all those tasks that you thought were so important.
Remember, there is power in them shoes.
Its the 4th of December here in California and the weather is changing, and, I've decided to get a jump on my Christmas baking and gift giving, doing a lot of "dry" runs on baking, making sure everything taste right before I make that batch of cookies and deliver them. There seems to be a theme running this year with me. Last year, I made home made gifts and burned my forearm on the iron. This year happens to be no different, I am making home made gifts and I burned BOTH hands holding melted sugar....I know, I know...I wasn't thinking and now I have a huge blister in the middle of my palm, of my right hand. The swelling has gone down quite a bit, I am able to type, but, it has become a nuisance.
This all has brought me to stop and think about some things. For my private practice I am having to wait to have my license renewed before I can continue seeing clients, so, that means, I get a "vacation". I've also been sick and that has caused me to slow down a bit as well, and now I burned my hands, and for several days, I've had to stop and slow down and let someone else help me. Waiting. I'm not a fan of it, yet, I've been told I am one of the most patient people in the world, I'm really not a huge fan of waiting and relying on others, including my own body to heal. Silly, I know, but, I also think there are others of you out there who have the same frustration. I knew that the license renewal was/is going to take some time, and I am okay with the waiting, but, being in pain and not feeling well can bring on additional stress because there is so much that needs to be done, and I don't have time to sit and HEAL.
I challenge you to stop in the next few days, even the next few weeks, and allow yourself to heal. No matter what it is that you are going through, no matter whether it is trying to stop smoking or drinking, or you are frustrated because something didn't go right for you, or if you are working through a broken relationship and it doesn't matter who that happens to be with give yourself some time to heal. Allow God or the Universe to work their "magic" and heal your body and soul. But, you've got to sit and be still and wait, even if that means allowing someone to take care of you or handle whatever it is that needs to be done. The power is in waiting and you are empowered to do it. Then once you are healthy and happy, again, you will have the strength to carry on and complete all those tasks that you thought were so important.
Remember, there is power in them shoes.
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